HOW TO KNOW WHEN MARRIAGE IS ABOUT TO COLLAPSE

Problems in marriage cannot be over-ruled. They are quite inevitable. No marriage relationship is without misunderstanding. Problems in Marriage as we say does not just happen overnight but sad to say that it builds up gradually. It always begins somehow and sometime with ‘little – little’ things called faults and careless jokes. It builds up gradually as each day passes by with one or both party not taking those “little - little things” serious. We developed an attitude of “it-doesn’t-matter”. And by the virtue of “it-doesn’t-matter” we take joy in sweeping those unresolved grievances under the carpet.
Divorce or break-up can be defined as an outburst of accumulated bottled up unresolved issues or differences. It becomes unbearable when it gets to the Climax and the resultant effect is divorce or break up.
But before the marriage crisis reaches a point of no return, there are signs or indicators that will show you that the Marriage is heading toward shipwreck. Armed with these indicators you can do everything within your reach as fast as possible to remedy the situation. Impossible is only found in the dictionary of mediocrity. These indicators are like smoke detectors in homes that alerts on any possible fire outbreak situation. What are these indicators?
1.Food Test: The moment the husband begins to find joy and comfort in another woman food outside his matrimony home, the break up is imminent. The effect of this attitude is that whenever the wife presents food, he starts with one complain or the other such as “the food is too cold”, “is not pleasant”, “I am not hungry”. All this excuses are sure indicator that somebody is somewhere working to take over your home. It is also indicator that the man is getting tired of the relationship. Afraid to eat your food, possibly he fears you might poison him. Mistrust has become very evident in such action.
2. Communication Test: When a husband or wife finds no joy in chatting, sharing, discussing together with his or her partner but rather can spend hours sharing and discussing with another man or woman. When a little joke or word brings provocation. When meaning is read to every sentence or utterance. When couples can no longer communicate freely. When words spoken do not brings joy to the opposite partner. A little thing flairs you up and you show resentment. It is an indicator there is a problem. When sense of reasoning is clouded .If all these shows up in your marriage, check them out the marriage is about to collapse.
3. Sexual Drive Test: When the wife uses sex as weapon of revenge to deny the husband his conjugal right. This action after repeated attempt the husband is forced to seek pleasure and comfort somewhere else outside his matrimonial home. When a wife finds sexual pleasure with another man outside her marriage. The “man or woman outside the marriage” controls the “husband or the wife inside the marriage”. The moment another woman or man succeeds in taking over the husband or wife the marriage is about to sink.
4. Fellowship Test: When the going was good both of you finds happiness, comfort, security in staying together. The fellowship was such a type that the unmarried envies. Always together with the children at the Beach, Sport Arena, watching TV together. The wife falls back to the man’s arm with comfort and assurance. The woman finds joy and fulfillment staying together with her man. What a beautiful picture of fellowship. The man at work longs to see the wife and children. The wife, whenever on tour or assignment outside the home longs to see the husband. She makes frequent calls to the husband and children. The children pose a question “where is our dad?” “Where is our mum”? But when the marriage is approaching collapse, the man finds no joy in staying with the wife or children. He finds happiness outside with another woman or children. Whenever a wife or husband cannot find joy, comfort, peace in staying freely for at least 2 hours with each other there is a serious problem looming around the corner.
5. Secrecy Test: When the marriage is about to collapse keeping secrets from one another becomes the order of the day. The cell-phone, diary, statement of accounts, and others. Wife is not allowed to check his bag. Phone calls are answered secretly. Any attempt to find who is calling raises a problem. Wife finds it difficult to undress before the husband. When you can no longer be open to one another the marriage is begging for a close.
As we take cognizance of the entire above indicators we can as well remedy the situation by asking ourselves the question “WHY”